Twenty Ashburn Teens Face Alcohol Charges After Post-Homecoming House Party

"My son is 5. And no, I will not feel differently about this. I am not that much of a hypocrite and I remember when I was a teen."


I know that I felt strongly about things when my kids were younger and then surprised even myself at how much my views changed/grew as I became the parent of a teenager. You can't possibly predict how you will feel in 10-12 years. That's a long time and a lot happens. And even if we did things "when we were that age"....it IS different when it's your child and you are concerned about their well-being and safety.

But this thread was about a group of kids that had alcohol at a party while an adult was present. Enough alcohol to send two kids to the hospital. What message does it send when we condone that? What if they got in a car and hurt either themselves or one of your loved ones? It is an important issue and I feel we are copping out by saying that kids will drink....we still need to let know right from wrong and not that the rules don't apply to them. They do apply and there are consequences. I would rather they learn that lesson before someone gets hurt.

 

Probably so but I'll do my very best to be sure that MY kid doesn't get into that kind of trouble. I'm not all spun up over it but it does reinforce my belief that it's up to me and my spouse to teach our child what's right.

 

I haven't changed much in the past 5 years so I doubt I will change much in the next 10-12.

As for condoning, if that was meant for me, I said I did not condone it. I also said that we should educate, threaten, etc, to get the message across.

 

What ya want, a cookie? Chris Rock (not meant as hurtful)

I would hope that everyone here tries to teach their children what's right.

 

It was a collective/societal "if we" comment.

 

You can try to keep your child away from drinking and bad behavior by keeping then "active in sports" but in all reality a teenager is going to be a teenager. And along with being one there is a lot of experimenting. Something just as innocent as watching t.v. can strongly influence a teenager to do a lot of things since most of the television shows are about sex, drugs or violence. I'm not saying that this is right but some teens can get influence easily. As a perfect example of an experimenting teenager we have a "house party" after a school homecoming dance were as we were told was filled with kids from ages 15-18, the most crucial years of a teenagers life where most drinking and "partying" takes place. Even though a parent was present during this "house party" does NOT mean that she was the provider of alcohol to any kid there. Adults don't seem to understand just how easy it is to be under 21 and still get alcohol. And for the people who sit outside of the ABC store, because they have no life, watching kids get alcohol by "older friends" are obviously not watching from both sides (Safeway and the ABC store).:naanaa:

 

She was responsible to chaperone any under age party at her home. Furthermore, she was aware of the alcohol, and this wasn't the first such party at her home.

 

Even if the parent didn't provide the alcohol, did they mislead other parents as to what they will allow visiting teenagers to do in their home, or lie and/or cover up what they find out has occurred? That scares me!

 

Its not possible to mislead other parents if you as a parent are unaware of what is occuring when your child has friends over. And there was no lying or covering up of anything in this situation obviously since everyone is well aware now of what happened that night at that house.

Also I'd like to say that the assigned officer to Briar Woods was well aware of this post homecoming even for a couples day prior. He did not warn anyone and waited until a few hours after the dance ended to "bust" the party. I personally think this whole situation could've been avoided if the officer had warned the student of who's house this happened at so that no kids would be charged for underaged drinking and the parent would not be in the situation shes in. Bad judgement on his part - 20 kids charged, 2 sent to the hospital and 1 parent whos in a lot of trouble and now that cop is a happy camper, it ended just how he planned

 

[QUOTE

Also I'd like to say that the assigned officer to Briar Woods was well aware of this post homecoming even for a couples day prior. He did not warn anyone and waited until a few hours after the dance ended to "bust" the party. I personally think this whole situation could've been avoided if the officer had warned the student of who's house this happened at so that no kids would be charged for underaged drinking and the parent would not be in the situation shes in. Bad judgement on his part - 20 kids charged, 2 sent to the hospital and 1 parent whos in a lot of trouble and now that cop is a happy camper, it ended just how he planned [/QUOTE]

If the administration and staff at BWHS jumped, and had to put out a red alert, every time they heard "rumors" of extracurricular activies "possibly" being held outside of school hours that "may" involve some criminal activity, they'd be working 24 hours a day. And being the spouse of a staff member, I can assure you that your tax dollars are paying for the overtime necessary, especially when staff has to wait outside these dances, often for over an hour, because parents come toodlin' up at their leisure to pick up their child. If you wonder why your child is tempted to go off and drink, look in a mirror. And quit expecting staff to be your babysitters and the ones to offer your children quality time...

 

I do not think the officer was happy about this party and how it ended. He and all the school admin work hard at their jobs. But, many parents were talking about this party at the game the night before. It was not rumor. It was fact. If I knew that, and the police did not, something is not right. It seems like the school is too reactive. Just like last nights game. There were some individuals there that everyone was keeping a close eye on. Waiting for them to do something wrong as they have done numerous times in the past. I suppose "lets give them another chance" was the thought. Everytime they get another chance, those knuckleheads mess up. So the vicious circle will continue until.........

 

Oh, that's rich. Blame the cop. I just don't get it....why can't there be fun after games without drinking? Why do parents think it's ok that their child "experiment"? Why does an adult think it's ok for drinking to be going on at her house? If it were my house, I would make it my business to know what's going on.

 

warning- long winded post cooooomin up!

i agree with eeeverything you said except the mirror. your kid's PERCEPTION of what you do will vary based on THEM. some kid's see parents who don't drink and decide to find out what they're missing. others think, "they don't do it, why should i?" some see their parents drink responsibly or occasionally and think "i'm dying to try it" and others think "not interested in doing anything my PARENTS do!" some have alkie parents and think "it's in my genes- i must NEED this" and others think "no way will i let alcohol rule me like they do"

i am REALLY surprised at how many ppl think that WE <parents> can influence teen decisions more than what's reasonable to believe. we can KNOW our kids, and their proclivity toward pushing the envelope, breaking the rules, bucking the system, and do a RISK ASSESSMENT of them to determine how we stack the odds in favor of making a smart decision. but ultimately, they will either USE the tools we give them, or the WON'T. and if they are given NO tools, the chances are greater that they'll try drugs or alcohol.

you aren't a failure as a parent if your kid makes a bad decision. for some kids- and adults- the only way to MAKE smart moves is to make dumb ones first.

my son just turned 10, and i can honestly say we need to start brainwashing him NOW. he is sneaky, a risk taker, and always looking to see how far across the line he can go with us. but our strategy won't be against alcohol- he knows we both enjoy wine (not to excess! )- but against BREAKING THE LAW and decreasing his capability to perform as an athelete. we would look like hypocrites and liars if we preached the "evils of alcohol", so we take a different tack and go with what we KNOW he will believe and care about.

he fears breaking the law sooo much (he went ballistic when he thought The Man was gonna litter!) and he does consider himself an athelete and treats his body as such. we stress that he is an ambassador of our family, and he should behave in a way that makes HIM proud, us proud, and his grandparents proud. so far it works on his grades, and on his public behavior, so hopefully we continue to be effective.

sorry, i just had a lot to say.

 

oh one more thing!! THIS party was the result of adult(s) making poor decisions- the one who allowed the party and the ones who knew what was going to go on and agreed to let their kids go. kids were being kids- adults were being irresponsible and should be punished accordingly. parents who KNEW and did nothing to stop it are as guilty as the hostess.

 

Redon1, except for the fact that you've contradicted yourself ("ppl think that WE <parents> can influence teen decisions"), then ("THIS party was the result of adult(s) making poor decisions")...I think your son has a pretty good chance of doing you proud. But again, I hope people will stop using these schools as a dumping ground for policing their children. What happens after school hours should not be their total responsibility. I know it takes a village to raise them, but let them expend their energies on teaching, not policing.

 

not a contradiction- kids made the decision to drink. a PARENT (or parents if you believe the previous statement that other parents knew and allowed their kids to go) made the decision to allow and facilitate this particular PARTY.

 

Kids, I don’t know what’s wrong with these kids today
Kids, who understand anything they say.
Kids, they are so ridicules and so immature
Noisy, Lazy, Sloppy crazy loafers
And while we’re on the subject
Kids, you can talk and talk until your face is blue
Kids, they will always do what they want to
Why can’t they be like we were?
Perfect in every way
What’s the matter with kids today?

(bowing)

 

So....Ozgood is a fan of "Bye Bye Birdie"?! (That's where the song is from... )

 

Correct, although the original did not have my bonehead spelling error that I was not able to correct in time.