Kindergarten Cutoff

We have friends with a child that just barely qualifies for kindergarten this year (by one day). They're contemplating whether to put him in or hold him back a year. He's been in daycare and is a very bright kid, but they're concerned that he will be the youngest in his class. Any insight is apprecitated.

 

I am not in your friend's situation as my son has a Dec birthday, but I am glad that he started later. I too didn't want him to be the youngest in his class and I found that most of the children in his class are in the same boat, with the exception of 1 or 2. I think that he is more mentally prepared and it's worked out great.

 

It's a reasonable question and I know of several people who have debated this issue for their children. It seems like many boys are being held back a year (at Kindergarten) if they have even a summer birthday. There are some benefits, especially if it is a boy and he is physically on the small side or if he is shy. Some parents do it so that later on the child will have a better chance in sports by being older and bigger, others due to social issues (that approach even has a name of "redshirting" like in college sports!).

On the other hand, the child might be perfectly fine in their scheduled year of beginning school. Only the parents know the child and his/her behavior and development issues well enough to make the decision. If the child has been in preschool then the teacher would also be able to help make any recommendations based on her knowledge of the child.

Of course, if the majority of people begin starting their children in school later (it seems to be a popular choice around here) then any of the potential benefits could be lost.

If the child seems to be awkward and shy then it might be best to wait until they are more prepared but if he seems ready let him begin his new adventure. I wouldn't base it on age alone, especially if he has friends in his neighborhood who would be starting school with him at the regular schedule - he might not understand why his friends are going and he is not.

That's just my 2 cents after hearing other parents discussing the issue.

 

We had a neighbor hold here daughter back a year. It was even obvious to me at the time her emotional develpment wasn't yet ready for Kindergarten. Then came my daughter's turn. She was tested to be ready mentally and physically, but missed the deadline by two weeks.
So she has always been one of the oldest in her class. She is a freshman in HS who truned 15 back in October, and now is wondering about the fact she can get her Learner's permit April!

My friend's son was born 4 days before her. When they were living in NC, he went to private school for a year, and then was able to enter 1st grade...bypassing the deadline. So he is a Sophmore in HS and is so no mentally mature, doesn't do his homework, doesn't help around the house, etc...Now she recognizes that she never should have done that! Too late.

 

Remember every child is different and should be evaluated with that in mind. In the "olden" days when I was in school the cutoff was the calendar year. I was October so I went to school and was one of the youngest. I can tell you that it didn't slow me down.

I may have been immature (still am) but I was always in the highest levels and even was pulled from my classes to attend the higher grades for math starting early on in elementary school. I think when I did get in trouble in school, it was because I was bored and needed more challenges. I think if I had been held back it may have been worse.

However, my sister had the same end of year type birthday and needed the extra year. She would have had more difficulties if she had not waited an extra year.

Children are like flowers, they will bloom when they are ready. Some are early in the season and some are later; they are all still beautiful.

Also, if the school system thought they could not handle it, they would probaly change the September 30 cutoff date again. It was December 31 for years.

Remember, parents know their children the best and realize that they are all different.

 

Well, somebody has to be the youngest. I don't think it should be based on his age and being oldest vs. youngest but whether or not he's ready. My oldest child has a birthday in the second half of September. We didn't feel he was ready, emotionally or academically, for Kindergarten the year he was turning five so we waited a year to send him. Haven't regretted it once.

My daughter has a mid-May birthday. Surprisingly, to me, she's one of the youngest in her class because so many of the other kids didn't start kindergarten until they were six.

 

my son is an october baby and missed the public school cut off by a few weeks. on a strong recommendation from our pediatrician, based on his social development, ability to concentrate, personality, etc., we put him in private kindergarten. (we chose Golden Pond.)

The Boy went into public school in 3rd grade when his age cut off no longer mattered) and has always done well- excellent grades (A's with usually 1 B), and the teachers are surprised to find out how young he is- they comment that he is one of the more mature boys.

i wasn't concerned about the youngest child thing since i went thru that as an oct baby myself that was held back, then skipped 2nd grade. didn't bother me, so far, doesn't bother him. what DID happen to me though is that kindergarten and first grade bored me into being a problem child- a disruptive, fidgety, bully.

as someone said earlier- it should be based on the child's maturity and social and academic aptitude whether or not they should be delayed a year.

i don't know that we as parent's can objectively decide that. when they tested The Boy at Christian Fellowship, they determined that he was ready for 1st grade depsite his age. same with Golden Pond for kindergarten. and for the record- we would have paid the same for preschool care at GP as Kindergarten, so making money was not a factor in their assessment.

 

I agree with all the posts about the child's maturity level, which is probably a better indicator than his brightness on whether to start him this year or next year. As a teacher who works with first graders, often you can tell who the "young" ones are, usually because they haven't developed socially, they don't listen well to directions, and/or they don't follow rules and directions as well as the others in the classroom. In fact, when there's some concern about a student, we do look at birthdate and have often commented, "Well, s/he's young." Of course, this is a generalization, and sometimes we do say, "Oh, s/he's not young...hmmm, I wonder what the issue is."

 

We were faced with this very same issue last year. My son's birthday is 9/18. We didn't know if he was ready or not so we just went ahead and let him go to kindergarten. As it turned out he was behind the other students in most areas, but he did get a lot out of it without slowing down the class. Now that he's back in kindergarten he's doing so much better and the fact he's repeating has never come up. We are still glad we put him through the first time and especially glad we held him back to try it again. Bottom line is you can't make a wrong decision here, but if you do end up waiting, it would be wise to get into a pre-K class or do kindergarten prep at home.

 

We researched this with our daughter (Oct 27th) and talked to middle school and high school guidance counselors and were told the same thing - if a girl and mature enough go ahead but because boys tend to mature later - they would hold back. We sent her. She struggled a little during Freshman year of high school, didn't make the soccer team because speed wasn't there and then really blossomed her junior year. Had she been held back, she would have done a little better - but the challenge really made her a better person. She is now in second year of college and doing amazing things. Still a very tough call with pros and cons to both.

 

part of our balancing act has been having The Boy as the youngest in certain situations and one of the older kids in others- particularly in sports, since that's his "thing". giving him a chance to flex leadership muscles in some situations, AND the test of "playing up" and rising to the challenge in others. it works out really well for him- developing a well rounded kid who learns to lead and follow without really knowing it's happening.

the other thing is- we don't make a point of it as being important, since it's not. if he mentions being the youngest, we can point out that he's taller than some other kids- that everyone has SOMETHING that makes them feel "different" and it's no big deal.

 

I found this list online. It said if a child meets most of these criteria, they are usually ready for kindergarten. I will say that when i used to volunteer in my son's kindergarten class, there were kids way pass the cutoff date who couldn't do some of these things.

I also think it depends how much preschool a child has had. Remember some kids have gone 5 days for years and some may have only had 1 year for a few days a week.

Here is the list.

• Listen to stories without interrupting
• Recognize rhyming sounds
• Pay attention for short periods of time to adult-directed tasks
• Understand actions have both causes and effects
• Show understanding of general times of day
• Cut with scissors
• Trace basic shapes
• Begin to share with others
• Start to follow rules
• Be able to recognize authority
• Manage bathroom needs
• Button shirts, pants, coats, and zip up zippers
• Begin to control oneself
• Separate from parents without being upset
• Speak understandably
• Talk in complete sentences of five to six words
• Look at pictures and then tell stories
• Identify rhyming words
• Identify the beginning sound of some words
• Identify some alphabet letters
• Recognize some common sight words like "stop"
• Sort similar objects by color, size, and shape
• Recognize groups of one, two, three, four, and five objects
• Count to ten
• Bounce a ball

 

I was held back an extra year by my parents and I strongly believe it was the best decision they ever made for me. Having an extra year to mature made me more able to handle school, to grasp concepts, and to learn. I think it made the difference between me being a top student in my grade or being a drop-out. If I had gone to school earlier, I have no doubt that I would have had problems and would have hated school.

I like the list that CMBM posted. If your child is not ready, hold him back for a year. Work on improving both his socializing and his academics. In the early grades both are important.

--- John B.

 

Does Anyone know if the Goddard School kindergarten is recognized by the public school?

 

Thanks for all the helpful input!!!

 

Yes, Goddard's school program is recognized by the state. Our freind's child goes there and confirmed this fact for me.

 

Thanks for posting this, though I'm more torn now. We were just discussing this recently how it's better to hold them back, especially boys. However, according to this list, my 3.5 year old is more than ready for kindergarten. (He's in the AOL daycare preschool program and very advanced compared to others his age).

What is the cutoff date and age anyway? I know my son will probably be right on the border with a sept. 4th bday.

 

Jeeze, we have a 20-year old in our house who can't manage these. :scaredeyes:

 

that's why we went off of the assessmentof our pediatrician. impartial eyes that see tons of kids from all different types of families. we were told to hold back our son by a prinicpal who never met him but who based the decision SIMPLY on his gender. HOGWASH. sure the odds show MORE boys could use MORE time, but not all of them by a long shot.

i bet if you fairly assessed boys with behavior issues but good grades, you'd find some of them are bored and not challenged mentally in class. bottom line, the stereotype doesn't fit 'em all.

 

I researched this topic last year when my son was going to kindergarten and even called my old professors at Teachers College, Columbia University. If you want any of the articles/research I'd be happy to share but the gist of all it was that you should not hold a child back solely on a birthdate. It should be decided upon the child's abilities (the list above is a good one). I could go on and on but like I said, I'd be happy to send you the data if you'd like. And I did send my son to kindergarten this year and he's doing beautifully and is right where he should be.